This happens because the members (though well-meaning) will constantly focus on the failings of your past, and your problems with alcohol rather than helping you look forward to what positive changes can be made in your life. And by constantly focusing on your problem with alcohol, the problem itself somehow seems even bigger, and more impossible than ever to overcome.
What we FOCUS on is very important, especially when it comes to changing the way we live our lives. Too many people fall into the trap of constantly worrying about how a particular problem has ALREADY affected them, rather than focusing in on what positive steps they can take to CHANGE.
When it comes to beating an alcohol problem, you should focus on the GOOD THINGS that you want to come into your life, and the POSITIVE CHANGES you want to make, instead of the mistakes and bad decisions of the past. SURROUND yourself with healthy, sober people who already have the habits and attitudes you want in your life.
When You Look in the Mirror You Will See the Person Who Can Change Your Life for the Better
Dont fall into I am helpless before alcohol trap that so many 12-step programs preach. It is nothing but a ready-made excuse to keep drinking because it abdicates personal responsibility.
In other words, YOU are the one who CAN and WILL make your alcohol problem a thing of the past. YOU are the one who CAN and WILL make the hard decisions and take the necessary steps to make your life happy. Dont pass along this responsibility to anyone else. It is up to YOU.
You Already Have the Power to Quit Drinking
The good news is that you already have the strength and motivation to stop. Alcoholism is NOT a disease, or something you are powerless before. It is, in fact, a bad habit that youve acquired over the years. And, just like other bad habits you may have had, it too can be broken.
The biggest reason that you have an alcohol problem is that youve allowed this bad habit to get the better of you. Well, its time to break that bad habit once and for all.
Beware Those Who Mean Well, My Friend
No matter what you do after leaving this site, I strongly urge you to ONLY surround yourself with people who can actually help you become a better person, and not those who simply want you to dwell on the mistakes of the past, either yours or theirs.
Dont waste your time by constantly reliving your past mistakes, when alcohol was a big part of your life. Instead, focus on how sobriety is NOW giving you a second chance. Remember, that which you focus on becomes bigger, stronger, and more powerful.
Beware those who mean well! Surround yourself with people who can help you become a better person, instead of wanting you to focus on your past mistakes.
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